restless nights...

One way that my body and brain deals with stress is through nightmares.  Ever since I was a kid, I've always had bad dreams when stressed out.  Sometimes, I can't remember the dreams, sometimes I can.  Sometimes the bad dreams I had as a kid come back to me even now as an adult and still freak me out.  
I've been having bad dreams the past few days.  It's going to be a stressful week.  I have 3 crits lined up this week - which is something I rarely do to myself but juggling so many schedules is difficult.  This week happens to be convenient for the people I want to hear from.  So, I'm stressed; and coffee is always nearby.

I keep dreaming about paintings falling off the walls, or that suddenly everyone in my committee hates all my work, and the worse - that I simply do not produce enough work.  My expectations for myself are quite high.  In the studio I feel a little frustrated.  Although I like my current work, I know it needs to go somewhere else - I really need to push it - but I just don't know where to take it.  I'm hoping that after these crits some of these problems might become more clear.  

Also, I ruined a painting this weekend.  It was beautiful before! and then I screwed it up because I was frustrated with it and tried something new.  I'm hoping I can save it still.  I'm going to give it a good try.

wip.

I also spent a few hours last week in the lab, looking at some of my "slide paintings" under the scope.  Below are some of those images.

mixed media with artist, cow, and pig's blood.

mixed media with artists, cow, and pig's blood.

mixed media with artists, cow, pig's blood.